Blog posting from Richard Grund

The Darkness of Despair

01/25/09 | by admin | Categories: Friends Of Caylee

Sometime Thursday evening and into the early morning hours of Friday morning January 23, 2009 George Anthony considered ending his life. I do not believe that he actually attempted to do so but the thoughts were swirling in his mind and heart. From what I have read of people contemplating suicide if you are really going to do it you do. Those that reach out to tell others of their desires are crying out for help. Whatever George’s intent was at that moment it is clear that the darkness of despair had him in its demonic grip.

Over the last 6-months it has become obvious that there has been tension between my family and the Anthonys for their efforts to apparently implicate not just my son Jesse and myself but, as we recently discovered, to also try to implicate my wife in Caylee’s disappearance. These actions, whatever their motivation, are inexcusable and heartlessly diabolical. However, that does not mean I am without compassion for George’s pain. I told him so in a text message sent to him early Friday morning. Christian compassion outweighs fleshly emotions or feelings. Faith outweighs the facts and love outweighs evidence when we know Jesus/Yeshua as Lord & Savior.

As I stated early on, I cannot imagine what it must be like to get up each morning and to look into a room where toys lay unused and unloved, knowing that they will never be held by their owner again. To see not one but two empty beds that will not hold their occupants again (assuming the outcome of the trial is a guilty one) has to wear on the heart. The constant nagging guilt of “what if” breaks down a heart and mind like nothing else we can imagine. The accusers’ voice screaming “what if” into your spirit will slowly take away your will to live and your ability to choose light over darkness. How can we not have compassion when we have all been victimized by these thoughts at some time in our lives?

We had Caylee in our life part-time for almost a year and the nagging “what if” brought me to my knees. George had her full time for almost three years and that must magnify his pain exponentially. There is, however, a larger difference between George and I. While my pain and feeling of failure bore deep into my heart and mind there was Another there to bring me out of it. My faith and personal relationship with a Living Loving God, as my Father, and with the Lord of my life, Jesus/Yeshua kept me safe and brought me through. The only way to remove darkness is to expose it to Light. By living in that Light of God darkness is weakened and powerless against us. You see, although our heart yearns for Caylee we know that we will see her again someday when it’s our time to go Home. We also have the distinct confidence that she is safe in the arms of the Lord. We know that we know that we know it. That’s what faith does. Faith is confidence in things we hope for and having the assurance of things we cannot see. Our faith tells us Caylee is all right. Moreover, our hearts which are filled with His Love know that she is all right.

So, to all of you that may wonder or stress over this sad story about a wondrous little girl named Caylee Marie Anthony, let me assure you that she is okay. She is safe, pure, perfect and happy. There is no more pain, no more sadness and no more darkness. If that assurance is not enough for you and you need more, just let me know. I have plenty go around. He fills my heart to overflowing and gives me rest. Come and rest with me as I rest with Him!

Richard Grund

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