Recognizing child abuse and knowing when to make the call

The recent story of a 5-year-old Gresham girl dying after years of abuse is
nothing short of horrible. But what makes things even more
frustrating is that the signs of abuse were obvious, Gresham Police
said, yet no one reported it to police. Court papers suggest there may have
been one call to Oregon's Department of Human Services, although the
agency won't confirm it.

Which brings us to the question: How do
you know when to make a call? What's the line between helping a child in
distress and being a busybody who disapproves of someone else's parenting?

Some of it is common sense. While you might not
personally swat your child on the bottom if he's misbehaving at a
grocery store, corporal punishment is legal.

But sometimes, something strikes you as just being wrong.

Susan Schmidt, director of the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline (1-800-4-A-CHILD). Childhelp,
a nonprofit dedicated to prevention of child abuse, runs a hotline
to help abuse victims, parents in crisis and assist people who suspect
child abuse may be occurring. Although the hotline does not take reports
of child abuse, the staff members provide information on how to make a
report and can give referrals to the appropriate agency in their state.

It is a difficult step for people to take, Schmidt said, noting that they
find callers make four or five attempts before they finally stay on the
line to speak with someone at the hotline.

"They are so afraid of 'am I really reading this correctly,'" she said.
"'What Pandora's box will this open up?"

But she urged that people, if they have that
suspicion, to make a report to the local child-abuse agency. It might
not result in an investigation by itself. But it creates a file into
which other reports -- by you or anyone else with suspicions -- will go.


She also notes that five children in the United States die
every day as a result of child abuse and neglect, she said, making
reports so critical to helping prevent abuse. "If not you, then who?" she asked.

Child abuse includes physical, sexual and emotional
abuse, but the most common form is neglect. Signs of child neglect include:

• Clothes that are dirty, ill-fitting, ragged, and/or not suitable for the weather
  

• Unwashed appearance; offensive body odor
  

• Indicators of hunger: asking for or stealing food, going through trash for food, eating too
  fast or too much when food is provided for a group
  

• Apparent lack of supervision: wandering alone, home alone, left in a car
  

• Colds, fevers, or rashes left untreated; infected cuts; chronic tiredness
  

• In schoolchildren, frequent absence or lateness; troublesome, disruptive
  behavior or its opposite, withdrawal
  

• In babies, failure to thrive; failure to relate to other people or to surroundings
  

Signs of physical abuse include visible marks of maltreatment, such as cuts,
bruises, welts, or well-defined burns, and reluctance to go home. Also,
the agency notes, "If you ask a child about how he or she got hurt and
the child talks vaguely or evasively about falling off a fence or
spilling a hot dish, think hard before you accept the child’s story at face value."

People should also be alert to signs of sexual abuse
which include an inappropriate interest in or knowledge of sexual acts;
seductive behavior; a reluctance or refusal to undress in front of
others and fear of a particular person or family member.

Signs of emotional abuse include apathy, depression, and hostility. If it
happens at school, the child may be reluctant to go to school and
develop or fake a physical complaint.physical complaint.

The agency hotline can also offer tips on reporting child abuse, but here
are a few key ones:

• If something is going on at that moment, call 911.
  

• Keep it factual. Child abuse is such an emotionally charged issue, but focus on collecting and relaying facts about the situation.
  

• Don't make a report because you want to harm an ex-spouse or make trouble for someone.
  

And finally, counsels Colette Brown, managing director of Providence
Wee Care, look for how you can help prevent child abuse before it
starts. Get to know the people and families around you. "Part of a job
of a village is to watch out for families in crisis situations or
stressful situations," said Brown. If you see an overwhelmed parent with
a child who's acting up in a grocery store, offer to open the door, or
lend a hand, she said. The parent may welcome -- or rebuff -- your help,
but it can help the parent regain perspective.

Got questions? Call Childhelp for information at 1-800-422-4453 (1-800-4-A-CHILD).